Every Day Is Different

















I guess I haven't been blogging long enough to know, but is it okay to have a post that isn't all rainbows and butterflies happy ? I don't know it it's BPC (blog post correct). But, I have just been feeling very down lately. I could go into my reasons but I don't want to bring anyone else down. And while I have much to be happy about, and I'm able to recognize those things... I'm just having a hard time lately. This weekend I felt very little motivation to do much of anything. But on Sunday I forced myself to do something that always relaxes me. Cooking !! To be in the kitchen all by myself, making something from scratch, really calms me down. I made a fresh pot of very good and healthy Italian Veggie Soup. YUM !! And while that was cooking away in the crock pot, I made some very easy homemade pretzels that Josh always gobbles up. (Pictures above and recipe found in the Martha Stewart book shown). This weekend was full of mixed emotions with a few good and a few sad things happening. Both to follow:

Happy: On Saturday afternoon I got a package in the mail. Let me preface this story by explaining how it all began. About a month ago, I was looking at Ashley's blog(see in my list of blogs: "It's Good To Be Ashley Carter" ). She was showing off a necklace she had just purchased and decided to have a give-a-way. Everyone who was interested was to leave a comment on her blog saying why they thought they deserved the necklace. So... I told her a little about Gracie and left it at that hoping I would be lucky and win. She said she would put all the names in a hat and draw one out randomly. Well, the winner was announced... and it was not me. So I pouted for about 5 minutes and went on about my day. Then I got a comment on my blog from Ashley asking for my email address, and saying she had a question for me. So I sent it to her. She responded by saying: Your comment was so touching that a person who wishes to remain anonymous wants to get you a necklace with your baby girl's name ... I was speechless ! I could not believe it. I ran downstairs and excitedly told Josh. So I gave Ashley all the information she needed to pass on to the jewelry maker Lisa Leonard: http://www.lisaleonard.blogspot.com/ (sorry, it won't let me add a link for some reason) and a few weeks later (this last Saturday) my lovely necklace with "Gracie" engraved on it, arrived. I took it out of the box and immediately put it on. I LOVE it !! And I am so touched that someone ( the card said Love Asley Carter, so if it was her, THANK YOU! I already sent her an email)That was beyond sweet, and I will never forget this. This was the highlight of me weekend.

Not so happy: My friend Mike text messaged my on Friday telling me he just got laid off. He's in Real Estate. He is the top seller of homes, works longer hours then the other guys, and isn't the newest guy to be hired... and HE gets laid off. It just doesn't make sense. I hate office polotics. Mike is the most positive person I know, and when we eventually talked on the phone, I have never heard him so down and confused. I invited him over for dinner on Saturday to talk and watch football with us, and try to get his mind off of it for awhile.

Happy: Having Hooper (Mike) over for dinner. Josh made us yummy steaks and I made some pasta w/ Pesto sauce and yummy rolls. (Yeah, I know.. high carb dinner, but we didn't care that night) For dessert I made a zucchini bread crumble w/ vanilla bean ice cream. Very good !

Not so happy: Josh came home from work on Saturday without calling me beforehand, which he usually does so I know when to expect him and if anything happens on the way home, I know which direction to go looking for him. He walked in the kitchen and said that he had a message on his phone from Heidi. Lofton's mom passed away a few hours before. They got there shortly before she passed, so they were able to spend some very quality time with her. We both just stood in the kitchen and cried for them. My heart ached for them. Even though I haven't lost a parent yet, I have lost my baby, so I know how it feels to lose someone you love so much. I don't think Josh has lost anyone to death yet. But he is not handling this very well. He cried when he talked to Lofton on the phone, and I know he is hurting for his friend. But I'm kind of worried about Josh too. He hasn't been acting the same since he found out about Lofton's mom. I think it's got him thinking about his own mom. Josh has not talked to his dad since he was about 4 years old. His mom is all he has. (besides his brother), but it's different when you only have one parent. I need to be senstive to this and it wasn't until last night, that I realized that something more might be going on with Josh other then him being sad for his best friend. I hate it when it takes me forever to figure things out. But I guess late is better then never right?

So, our weekend was full of ups and downs. Good and bad. Lauging and crying. Raised voices and soft "I'm sorry's " . Life is not fair sometimes. But from the hard times, we will grow and become stronger. This I know !

Comments

Mari said…
I'm sorry for the low points of the weekend. I just love the nacklace and I know you will treasure it forever, not only as a remembrance of you Gracie, but added to that - the kindness of a stranger. There are a lot of good people in the world!
Kasey said…
Deb, that necklace is precious. I hope you're feeling better today than did over the weekend. I made you laugh, right? :)

Will you post the martha stewart recipe for the soft pretzels?
Kari said…
I agree with what Mari said ... not only is that gorgeous necklace a remembrance of your precious little girl but the reminder that there are such good and thoughtful people in the world - many whom we don't even know. I am so sorry to hear about Lofton's mom. I know you will be a strength to them and Josh through this difficult time. And as far as I'm concerned, I think it is more than okay to blog about the struggles right alongside the sunshine and roses ... that's what life is made of :)